It's good to hear from you too, Sticks. This board doesn't get much traffic (kind of nice, really), but it's good to see some familiar faces... er, read some familiar typing?

Cat

Ha ha! The site appears to be taking submissions again!

Cat

Well, I've been out of town - Tennessee, in fact, spelunking and visiting my grandmother. I've got a whole collection of new bruises and scrapes, plus a few bug bites. The weather there is about ten degrees cooler than it is here in Texas, and they have mountains and trees. Also rain and fog, but as an alumnus I was able to reserve the forestry cabin and we all stayed fairly dry... but only fairly.

I'm still catching up on laundry, though. I'll put up pictures as soon as we get them developed - we took a bunch inside several of the caves, so there should be some very cool pics.

More news later - I'm still catching up.

Cat

Gee, what, did everyone get scared away?

Wow! That's... phenomonal!
(Now I know who you are on ebay...)

Sid

Wow. I just made a couple of hundred dollars selling old magic cards on Ebay. Scary! Not that they're bad cards - they're rare cards in good condition - but they're just cards!!! Not to brag about it (well, okay, maybe a little), but this one is my biggest sale to date.

Two cards.

Wow. Glad I saved 'em.

Cat

I have no idea where that came from. Really. :)

Although I'm working on 'If I Ever Become A Best-selling Author':

1. I will never attempt to publish my grocery list/list of things to do/love poems/etc.



Sid

Heh. Trust Sid to come up with the really scary ideas...

Cat

If I am ever a Television Evangelist...

Let's see... I can think of some really bad ideas:

If I ever become a CHUD...
...Just kidding...

If I am the parent (or nanny) of the Antichrist...
...I will not ignore the fact that my child screams and goes into convulsions any time he is exposed to holy items or religious imagery. This is one of several obvious signs that you need to consider sacrificing your child for the greater good.
...I will not assume that all the bizarre and unlikely deaths occurring around me are a tragic coincidence.
...I will not assume that just because the child is female, I am safe.

If I ever develop vast psychokinetic powers...
...I will not destroy Neo-Tokyo. {g}
...I will not terrorize my high school prom. Why bother? Do you know how much money you can make with simple telekinesis? Why kill everyone when you can come to the reunion as a millionaire?
...I will not start my own cult. Strange religious movements attract entirely too much attention. Bank robbery is a much simpler alternative.
...I will not pick fights with the military. They have big guns, orbital lasers, and other nasty devices. Telekinesis may enable me to deflect a bullet, but it does not improve my reaction time.
...I will refrain from obvious uses of my power in public, especially if I have made a career of bank robbery.

Open for more suggestions...
-Cat

If I am ever abducted by aliens:

I will immediately submit to a full body x-ray and cat scan to ensure that no tags, transmitters, or other forms of graffiti have been planted in my body.
I will find a competent hypnotist to restore any missing memories.
I will make my home downtown in a big city, preferably near an international airport or air force base. Aliens hate that. They like people who live waaaay out in the country by themselves.

Sid, don't forget time in jail for the country singer.
Cat, glad i could make you laugh. I'm enjoying what you guys are coming up with.
Em

If I am ever abducted by aliens:



I will not sell my story to the tabloids.
I will not become a 'guru'.
I will not babble about little green men.


Hmm.

How about 'If I ever become a County Singer'...

I will not sing about my divorce, cheating husband, dying dog, or trailer park...

Sid

Em, you have just been added to the coveted list of People Who Have Made Me Spit Coke On My Monitor. (You'd think I'd know better than to drink while reading this, but still...)

Hm... If I ever become a zombie or ghoul:
1.) I will not lurch around after people in search of brains or body parts to eat. Instead, I will get a job in a mortuary or funeral home, where I can feed myself more discretely.
2.) I will not claw at my food with my bare hands; that's what silverware is for.
3.) I will undergo a full embalming, and move to a hot, dry climate. Nothing is more disgusting than watching yourself rot. Likewise, I will spray myself with air freshener as part of my daily ablutions.
4.) I will not live in a graveyard. There are plenty of perfectly good houses within walking distance of such places.
5.) I will keep a supply of salt and hot peppers on me at all times, especially during business meetings and any other occasions that might tempt me to revert to mindlessness.
6.) I will stay far way from any honfour, necromancer, etc. who may wish to control me for use as an undead servant. There's no such thing as a trustworthy sorcerer.

Cat

This is fun. I wish I had more time this morning to write something. Maybe I'll get back later.
Sid, I'm glad there is an idea in something I said. Wow!

Ghost:
I will not hang around the area where I died. Why should I depress myself like that? I'm going to Vegas!

Em

Thanks, Cat. :) I keep getting good ideas for the book I'm going to write for the 3-day novel contest.

Sid

Ghost:
I will refrain from walking through walls in public, unless the people around me are all very drunk, in which case it might be fun to watch them try to duplicate the feat.
I will not possess my old automobile, no matter how stylish the vintage.
If I am on a mission of revenge, I will not perform parlor tricks in an attempt to scare my victim to death. Instead, I will save my efforts for an appearance at that one critical moment (walking near the edge of a cliff, speeding on an interstate) where it will do the most good.

Werewolf:
I will not brutally murder my friends and loved ones. Their ghosts will hang around and say snide things to me, and that gets old pretty quickly.

By all means, Sid. Anything here is public domain; you know that.

Cat

If I ever become a ghost:

I will refrain from haunting relatives unless they deserve it.
I will, on the other hand, enjoy frightening small children
I will not appear to any exorcists/paranormal investigators
I will not wear chains or change my name to Marley
I will not possess any mediums to say goodbye to my lost love
I will not leak ectoplasm


Actually, Em, that would be a great story. :-) You've given me an idea.

****8.) I will not rely on candles when summoning supernatural beings which may appear in a rush of wind. Electric light works just as well and does not constitute a fire hazard. Nor does it go out at the least little puff of wind. I will also eschew incense; plug-in air fresheners will do fine. ***

Ohhh, this too!! Can I use it, Cat? huh? Pllllease??

Sid

If i ever become a leprechaun:
I will trade in my pot of gold for an off-shore bank account
I will expand my wardrobe to include colors other than green
That's all i could come up with.

I live in a moble home park that is full of retirees, they know everything that goes on in the park. A monster wouldn't have a chance here. lol
Em

Hmmm...

If I ever become "the leprechaun":

I will carry sneezing powder with me at all times (or do I have this confused with another movie?).

If I ever become a witch (Hallowe'en variety, not a Wiccan):
1.) I shall get those unsightly warts removed through the miracle of plastic surgery.
2.) I will get rid of my cauldron and upgrade to a stainless steel cookpot in my ktchen.
3.) I will take public speaking courses to get rid of that annoying cackle.
4.) I will refuse to keep company with gypsies, native americans, and anyone else who might try to stick a nail through my footprint.
5.) I will limit my broomstick use to cloudy, foggy evenings when no one is likely to see me.
6.) My familiar will assume the form of something sweet and innocent: a miniature poodle, beagle, or hamster.
7.) I will make a careful inventory of the things available at my local Whole Foods store, so that I need not hang around occult shops (let alone end up scrounging in the woods at night - brr!) to get that special ingredient.
8.) I will not rely on candles when summoning supernatural beings which may appear in a rush of wind. Electric light works just as well and does not constitute a fire hazard. Nor does it go out at the least little puff of wind. I will also eschew incense; plug-in air fresheners will do fine.
9.) Likewise, rather than a ten pound grimoire for my spells, I will carefully compile all my notes into a Word document, which I can then copy onto my palm pilot.
10.) Any pentagrams, altars, sacrificial livestock, bloody knives, unwilling victims, etc. will be kept in my basement, attic, or other out-of-the-way place, which will then be locked with a stout padlock.
11.) Should an angry lynch mob appear on my doorstep in spite of these precautions, I will not threaten to lay a horrible curse on them, nor will I zoom away into the night on my broomstick. I will call the police, and shoot anyone who steps onto my property.
12.) If someone really deserves to be cursed, and I simply cannot resist, I will not call down a horrible fate of obvious supernatural origins. That means no wasting away, no unknown new diseases, no instantly withered limbs. I will limit my curses to those which cause automobile accidents, plane crashes, violent muggings, and IRS audits.

What's next? If I ever become a ghost?

Cat

That's true--I have only retirees living around me. They don't speak English, so they aren't that nosy, but they do notice everything.

Sid

Nah Cat, a "monster" trying not to be caught shouldn't live in an older residential section of town, the retirees are just as nosy as kids. One would need to live in a neighborhood where all of the families have two jobs and the kids go to day care or have after-school activities.
I don't really watch monster movies, so I don't have anything else to add.

I had hoped that I would be back to posting on the list again by now, but things are still hectic at home. Sorry.
Em

Hmm...

I shall remove all weighty silver candlesticks from my home.
I shall live in the city, where people are unlikely to have wolfsbane growing in their garden. Preferably an older, residential section, where there are no nosy neighborhood children.

I'll see what else I can come up with.

Cat

Yes, I remember that. :) Lol. I haven't seen that in a long time.
You know what I did for two hours today? I reread most of the b-town messages on yahoogroups.

Yes, I was having story trouble, and bored. Although the messages weren't boring at all.

You know, you could do one for werewolves as well...

If I Ever Become a Werewolf:

I will shave my eyebrows so they don't meet in the middle
I will not be caught near the pet aisle in the supermarket
I will not work at a meat processing plant
I will not use flea shampoo
I will have a dog so my neighbors won't get suspicious
or I won't have any neighbors
I will always call in sick when there is a full moon
And I will never change in public
I will not run with the pack
And I will stay far away from chicken farms
I will keep a current calendar so I know when the full moon is, for that matter.
I will never invite people over during the week of the full moon
I will shave regularly.

(Okay, obviously I haven't read that many werewolf stories.)

Sid

Heh. I know this one has made the rounds before, but...

If I Ever Become a Vampire:
I shall wear tweed, and cheerful bright clothing. Further, I shall only wear trenchcoats if it is raining or foggy.
I will not take my victims home. My neighbors are far too nosy.
I will be secure in my immortality. I do not have to share my story with any reporter or struggling writer.
I will not purchase an expensive foreign sports car or motorcycle. An economical, multi-terrain vehicle with 4 wheel drive will be just fine.
I will immediately become Agnostic, disarming any cross-wielding religious maniacs.
I shall not keep a coffin in the basement, that's the first place people look.
I shall immediately purchase a Hooked on Phonics tape, in order to lose any Romanian accents I may have.
My ghouls shall have good posture.
I will purchase a digital watch with an alarm. I will set this alarm for TWO hours before sunrise, giving ample time for traffic and other inconveniences.
If I feel truly alone, and need a companion to share all of eternity with, I shall purchase a dog. Preferably one that is not larger than I am.
If the neighborhood kids are snooping around my house, I will not change into a giant wolf and attempt to destroy them. Instead, I shall call the police and have them arrested for trespassing.
If I believe far too many people are becoming suspicious, I shall not attempt to kill them all. I will simply move, and leave no forwarding address.
There is no logical reason for someone to mistake another human being for a fifteen-foot bat, not even in hysteria. Therefore, I shall refrain from such transformations in public.
Artists are over-emotional and unstable. I shall not keep company with them whatsoever.
I will not attend gatherings of my own kind. If I'm a lethal killing machine, doomed for all eternity to destroy those around me, they probably are too.

Probably not, but that's ok. :) I like it anyway. It will fit in a book somewhere, I'm sure.

Sid

Oh by all means, be my guest. I *can't* be the first person to come up with it.

Cat

Can I use the unlife to live? Please?? Pretty Please??
(Oh, my characters will kill me.)

Sid

Just trying to help... {grin}

Cat

"Remember, you only have unlife to live..." I love it!

LOL!! *snicker* Oh, my. that was greatly horrible!

Now Sid, don't get cross; anger leads to missed-stakes. I know you've mist talking to everyone, and doubtless it's left you feeling drained. Don't worry, it hasn't been in vein. Maybe some exorcise would help? I'd recommend running, water or not you need to. It night make you feel better. Remember, you only have unlife to live.

Oh, and my deepest fangs for your kind comments on my writing.

Cat
"Couldn't think of anything for garlic or wolf, tho"

I should be finishing up the stuff I absolutely have to do pretty soon, then I'll be able to get back to the story line.
Of course we liked Tarin's story Cat, I can't wait to read more of your work.
Sorry Sid, I don't have any vampire jokes at all to tell you.
Em (who is trying to remember this board is here)

Oh, come now, Cat. How could we not like it? It was great. :)
(I'm trying to remember to check this every day.)

Sid (who needs a really good but stupid vampire joke.)

Wow. Glad you guys liked it.

This seems to be a pretty busy time for everybody. {g} I'm hoping it'll settle out in another couple of weeks so we can wind up the current storyline.

Cat

Hey Sticks, I resemble that remark.
Tarin's story is wonderful Cat! I sometimes wish I could coax words into doing what I want them to like that.
This is an extremely busy time for me right now, but things should mellow out soon.
Em

Oh, and it's a great story, as well...

Sid

Well, as far as Bordertown goes, I recently finished a bit of fanfic (which is up at http://www.geocities.com/ash_falcon/ under the entry for Tarin) plus, the longer, more complete version of Ronin's story is up there too. There isn't too much artwork, but Mouse has a really interesting character sketch...

The Mailing list is still running, though there are a number of people who are absent or lurking due to hectic real-life stuff. And, of course, we're just closing a school year, which is always a quiet time for Btown stuff.

I'm really pleased to see people actually using this board, too!

--Cat

Well, I'll have to remember to check every day. :) We miss you too, Sticks!

Me! When I remember to check, that is...

Sid

You're welcome Sticks =)
I've wondered who's still around too. I'm only familliar with a few characters and their RL counterparts.

Oh wow, congratulations Lyrin!

sticks, the story so far is at Cat's page, http://www.geocities.com/ash_falcon/

Lol. A guy I work with now asked me if I needed anything to help me pass. As if!

Sid

sheesh! It just is not that hard to pass a drug test, even when you have things in your system that you would rather no one knew about! Silly people.... Ziya

I had to take a drug test for my current job. I laughed when they told me, and said something about how hard it was going to be to lay off all that heroin and crack cocaine until after the test.


They told me not to joke about it. Turns out the previous two (TWO!) applicants had made it all the way through the interviewing process, been offered the job, and then washed out on the drug test. Yeesh. How stupid can you get?

On second thought, don't answer that.

Cat

Lol. Evidently not! :-)

Congrats Sid!

I have never contributed to a BBS before. I did read all of Annie that was available before joining the email list tho and enjoyed it. It seems these can be as confusing (and possibly more so) than chat programs. I look forward to seeing what comes of this venture and (hopefully) adding a little bit myself :-)

Drug test, well, I guess I passed. They didn't find anything but caffeine in this body.
And I got the job, so I'm a happy camper.

Sid

Hey Ziya! Good to see you. This isn't as busy as the mailing list - not that that's a *bad* thing... {g} Especially since it gets Sticks and some of the other email-impaired to stop by from time to time.

Cat

Hi all, I'm here (thanks for the invite Cat!) I'll have to figure out how it works when I'm not at work :-)

Ooooh, spiffy! Oops, I think my brain is on vacation too.

Oooh, look! simul-posting!

It's Spring Break here, so Cassie is home all day and bored out of her skull. I have a hard time concentrating on what I want to say when she's velcroed to my ankle. LOL

So how'd the drug test go, Sid? You taking anything you didn't know about?

Cat

Woohoo! I must admit, I've been remiss in posting here - for various reasons, none of them terribly important. I *am* glad to see people actualy using this thing, especially since even the email is pretty darn slow at this point. One of those times when everyone gets busy, I guess...

Cat

Where did everybody go?

Oh, I'm hoping. I'm really sick of this job! (Went for a drug test today for the new job--so I should know something concrete next week or late this week.)

Sid

Blow them up. It'll be therapeutic. Or better yet, go get a better job and blow them *off.* Living well is the best revenge, as well as the best way to advertise...

Cat

Good luck Sid! I've wanted to blow up a job I had, but things turned out OK in the end. I didn't have to blow them up, they went bankrupt not too long after they laid me off. (Hee, hee, hee ;->)

I managed to blubber over my friend from my writers' group...

Starting revisions this weekend. I'm hoping I will have a new job soon too, if I don't blow up this one first (not kidding, really.)

Sid

It'll be great, Sid! You'll see!

Cat

Okay, I'm scared. Frightened. I just got a revision request from my editor. That's not a big deal--I knew it needed a lot of work (especially when I re-read it and found all the spelling mistakes I'd missed!) But that means it's really real. I'm really getting a book published. (quaking)

Sorry to be such a baby. This is scary!

Sid

Well, it's not a necessity. Though I'm glad that people seem to be enjoying the Blog, I won't be offended if it doesn't seem compelling enough to keep people here. I hate to say it, but *I*'ve gotten used to the mailing list... And that's one of the big reasons why the RPG is still there, instead of here.

Cat

I found this group too late to be able to post on Annie. I'm used to getting everything in my mailbox, but I'm trying to remember to come and post.

I know I have to get used to checking this more often. I've gotten lax after Annie went bye-bye.

Sid

We went to Blockbuster Music Wednesday and it's changed names again It's now Wherehouse Music. I found that interesting since I was trying to figure out where Brianna belongs in Btown all the way there.
Em

Possibly,but maybe we just don't quite know what to do with the board yet.
Em

Hm... Not much traffic over the last couple of days. Probably a good argument for leaving the roleplaying over on the mailing list.

Cat

Yes, editing is great. (We must be here at the same time, TW.

Sid

I went to see Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Cat. (good movie! great soundtrack!) Monkeybone was my second choice if the first one didn't work out. Hannibal was 3rd.

Sid

Hello All, I made it to your BBS. Hopefully this will come thru alright.

Vandellyr

Wow. Another Monday morning at work. And here I am, slaving away... Okay, maybe not. Stickman, good to have you back; what've you been up to? I'm proud to announce that I accomplished absolutely nothing this weekend (except to make some progress on one of the Final Fantasy games and catch up on my sleep). Well, St. Raven and I went to go see _Monkey Bone_ which was great. *Bizarre,* but I really enjoyed it. So I guess that wasn't a total waste...

Cat

Yay! I'm in! Hi, everyone!

Wow! We have people. Okay, cool. What now? Well, say hello, look around, talk. Have some tea! We *could* move the roleplaying bits over here, but I'm still waiting on people and I kinda want to see how this works out before I do anything like that.

Cat

Hrmph. It looks like all I've managed to get is descending order within a given day. I looked around, and I don't see any way to make the order of *days* descend as well, so I guess we're stuck with it. I'd do it the other way around, but I just hate reading bottom to top...

Cat
Perfectionist? Me? Never!

Sticks, click on the team button, then click on your name to see your profile. You should be able to edit from there.

Of course! Peppermint sprigs and fresh cinammon for anyone who wishes to add them to their tea. There's even semi-fresh border-coffee for the philistines... {g}

Cat

Hi Cat, please don't get up, I'll get my own tea. Do you have peppermint?
Em

Quick note: (Yes, we're pretty much learning as we go.) Once you have your post the way you want it, click on "Post & Publish," not just "Post." Otherwise it shows up here but not out on www.bordertown.blogspot.com.

Thanks,
Cat

Okay, welcome to Daddy Warbucks, the (hopefully) replacement board for Annie. Sorry for deleting all the test posts, I was trying to get the messages into descending (rather than ascending) order. It seems to be doing what I want it to do now. {g} Bordertech, yeesh!

Anyhow, welcome back. Come in, have some tea, make yourselves at home!

Cat